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.Sunday, July 08, 2007.

back then owner said "it's cause you matter that i thought you'll be better with her.. "
and today flower said "i distant from you it will solve the problem.."
I can't seem to understand... have they really thought through.. it seems to me no.. it seems to me they are choosing the easiest way out.. one is my mummy, the other is my owner.. this angel here is lost at what to say or do.. I love them dearly.. But yet, it seems to me, time after time, they keep making me choose.
"It's either her or me.."
flower's parents found out, perhaps from her blog or from my blog.. but whatever the case, they found out. I feel irritated.. irritated not because they found out.. but because 1. they actually read into their child's life and dictate.. Adults have more life experiences, they have went through this.. but the conditions are different.. there is no ceteris paribus.. what's wrong with loving someone in a different role and heart? because I dun love her as a wife, it doesn't mean i dun love her or care or protect her.. It just means it's a different kind of love.. like a baby loving his mummy.. but they tried pulling her away.. they tried to pull her away last year.. they tried to (pardon me) psycho me away last year and this year even as a baby they pulled his mummy away.. Is this necessary.. is it necessary that a baby, a child can't love people purely.. why can't people see there is no hidden meanings or agenda.. why can't people understand there is no possesiveness of the other.. all the baby wants to do is to love his mummy.. and for 2. they doubt me again. I believe one is they doubt i'm a true Christian.. They sense my values are wrong etc but pardon me.. piglet is a child that loves and gives.. piglet only sensed that anything more will kill.. I used the term kill because emotionally, physically, it is too much for anyone of us to take.. for that, is it not a good enough reason.. am i to be selfish or to force the love as a husband and wife unto the situation..
Piglet angel's sense and tele feels that owner is feeling insecured.. owner is crying and trying to freeze herself.. but yet.. has she wondered.. has she really understood.. She said is it alright.. is it alright.. piglet wants to question.. for the "adults" it's wrong.. but what about your angel.. what about this CHILD.. what's wrong with a child loving his mummy and what's wrong with a child loving his wife.. It only means he loves them, not two timing but he loves them.. he loves his mummy as a wonderful mummy and he loves his owner as a wonderful wife.. where then does the problem exist.. it's not like the situation she always quote, what if i hug my ex or my guy friends, my question is.. if one is hug in that situation, the rest are hugged.. because "it is alright to hug a guy".. and her purpose of doing so is to get back or to just because he can why can't i.. but the feeling? is it like piglet? when he hugs, he hugs only his mummy.. his mummy for goodness sake.. the one that feeds him milk in a bottle.. owner quoted, when you go shop with flower mummy for clothing, what if i go shopping for clothing with another guy.. once again I wish to explain that the environment and situation is different.. I'm going and accompanying her as her baby.. if it was any other girl i would not.. it's not like in the first place she is accompanying me to buy mine.. it's a wrong way to quote..

piglet wants to love purely.. piglet wants to care purely.. piglet wants to hug purely.. piglet even wants to cry purely.. why must it be that everyone keep trying to force piglet's adult side to take control.. I'm only a child out of the robot toy... why must it be that my pureness is seen as stained.. angel hurt.. child sad.. baby crying.. piglet dying.. they seem to be saying like they are adult here adult there.. everyone seems to be making their own decisions and assuming they are right but they are looking at an angel.. a child.. a piglet.. I'm hurt.... I'm hurt...




7/08/2007 01:00:00 PM